Kit for Kat!

Archives: August 2010

Pride and Joy
Posted By SLK on Friday, August 20, 2010
I am the bad cop around here and Papa is the good cop. He can never say ‘NO’ to the girls. If he feels something should be declined or taken away, some way or the other, I end up being the one who actions it and invariably I become the bad cop once again!

Kat has Papa wrapped around her little finger and Kit is surely learning FAST. They have this little game very day – Papa will come home and ask Kit – “Who do you love most, Papa, Mummy or Kat?” and Kit will raise her eyebrows, pretend to think, shrug, roll her eyes and then say – “Today is mummy day” or “Today is Kat day” and then Papa will pretend to cry and she will say “OK – today will be your day!” – then Papa will act crazy and do some jiggle wiggle and they will end up tickling each other – all this ending with five kisses for Papa – 2 cheeks, forehead, chin and lips – after all this love affair is FINALLY over, Kit will start her LONG list of complaints about Kat and how she never got those doll clothes or those books from Kat and how she pushed she wishes she could have all of Kat’s things – Oh my God! Such drama for a 3.5 year old!

Papa is also the Santa Claus for them because I am the one who will say ‘NO’ to most things so most demands are made to Papa who then treats them rather (un)wisely. Kat is obviously the more worrying one in her demands (as they cost more!) and also because Kit will only copy what Kat has which is a greater worry...Till now, it was simple, Kat would go to Papa – ask for something and then she would get it (eventually) BUT yesterday I noticed that Kat has reasonably matured in her perception of relationships – she came up to me and said:

Kat: “Mummy, I have noticed something about Papa”

Me: “And?”

Kat: “Papa always likes to give and all he wants is a little love in return.”

The moment of truth is here...I look at her and wonder if this is what an iTouch, iPad or iPhone 4 in quick succession do to you or is it just the realisation of his unconditional love that has finally dawned on Kat. We then also talked about how quickly his anger comes and goes and how he doesn’t mean a word of what he says (and we all agree on that). We discussed his other good and not so good points and in the end Kat decided he was the best Papa around!

It was a true heart to heart about her feelings for Papa – something we had never discussed before. So nice to see her grow up as a friend – she’s always standing tall right next to me every day after her shower; desperately trying to be my height...I so look forward to her years ahead! Our Kat, as we call her...our PRIDE AND JOY.

If I die, who will teach my daughters?
Posted By SLK on Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Today’s post is about an article I read a couple of months ago which worries me every now and then – "If I die, who will teach my daughters?” Click here to read the full article and the story of this amazing dad (best-selling author Bruce Feiler) who was diagnosed with a rare, deadly bone cancer and how he formed a “Council of Dads” to support his girls.

We all have dreams for our children from the day they are born...sometimes even before they are born. Our babies, so precious, so innocent, we want to protect them from all evil in this world. It breaks my heart to think that fate can strike so brutally anytime, anywhere and that innocent lives can be changed forever.

Let us be grateful and happy for what we have today. What will happen tomorrow – we cannot say but we can surely make a better today.

We have two beautiful girls and are thankful to God for giving us a happy and healthy family.

Sometimes, Kat will ask me at bedtime: “Mummy, what will I do without you?”

This always brings tears to my eyes while I jokingly reply “I’m not going anywhere!” - One day, I WILL (and hopefully it will be a natural and timely process) and by then she WILL know what to do without me…God Bless.

Today's Wish...A Baby?
Posted By SLK on Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Kit’s best friend has a baby sister and she’s just come back from a play date with her. All I’ve heard for the last 15 minutes is non-stop oohs and aahs about the little, tiny baby and how cute she is. (Kit’s also had a new baby girl cousin recently so conversations have been dominated with baby talk and baby pictures etc.)

Kit (with a puzzled look on her face): “Mummy, I don’t remember you from when you were a baby?”

Me: “That’s ok. I remember you from when you were a baby.”

Kit: “I was born when Papa was born”. She believes that. (She also believes that I am Papa’s mum!)

In our house, Kit is the expert wisher. She will always WISH. Sometimes she will wish that her toys or her dolls could fly or sometimes she will wish that all of Kat’s things could be hers (not a bad one!) or sometimes just a blanket wish to cover everything – “I wish all my dreams could come true”. However, today’s wish is different – today she is upset with me because she wishes I could “born a baby” on her birthday (by November?!)

When Kat was alone and younger, she used to pray for a sibling at bath time as that was her ‘time alone with God’ – and then we had Kit (of course she thought then that her prayers had been answered!)

Kit is really upset with me – she is so angry – she wants a baby NOW – how on earth is that going to happen? She is pouting in one corner. Only a creative meal with chicken can be a distraction for her now...

Silent Heroes
Posted By SLK on Monday, August 16, 2010
When I was 10 years old, life was all about having fun today and looking forward to having more tomorrow. The complex relationship battles and awareness episodes came much later in my life and once they did, they lingered on...

Life today is so different. I look at Kat and I look at myself when I was 15-16 years old and she’s only 10! Her mind is so complex, her feelings so mature but her mind is still of a naive child. So last night, following a cue from a story of a child paedophile arrest, we discussed at length with Kat.

It disturbs her to know that the world can be a bad world and that children can be bought or sold for purposes of child pornography. It frightens her to know that parents can even sell their children for money. It is all so fictional to her. People who can or are a part of this horrifying trade are CRUEL but as parents, we feel it is our responsibility to educate her about this reality, for her own safety (the taekwondo lessons come next!).

Kat was distressed, very distressed but we feel a lesson well learned…never to text/chat with strangers online, always come to us with any problem (big or small) and never to feel that we are anything but friends. Such conversations are never easy but every parent goes through these moments and I hope that there will not be a situation when these promises will be put to test but we just want to teach our children that we will be there for them…whenever they need us, just like our parents have been for us, our lifeline, our SILENT HEROES.

Who's at the door? Come on, quick!
Posted By SLK on Friday, August 13, 2010
Maybe Kit has some canine association from previous lives or is it some extra sensory perception (ESP) gained in this life, this form - whatever it is but she is the one whose ears will pick the sounds of the doorbell even before your hands pass the signal to the brain and reach out to push it (it seems)!

Kat on the other hand gets so engrossed with her books or movie or whatever she is doing (she actually starts smiling and nodding with a character in the film – a habit she’s picked from Papa!) that she needs to be reminded (with eye contact) to keep her EARS OPEN for the doorbell.

Kit will drop whatever she is doing when she hears the bell ring. Its like a challenge to her to get to the door first (not that Kat is even bothered!) She needs to be reminded to slow down but she will not – the doorbell is ringing and door is to be opened.

This passion is great – the only problem being that if anyone else opens the door, she gets VERY upset. Sometimes very emotional too!

If Kat happens to open the door to Papa, he has to go out again, ring the doorbell, this time Kit opens, he acts surprised and all is fine again... Sometimes, when his reaction is not natural enough, he has to make the grand entry a couple of times...till Kit is satisfied that she's not been tricked (?) otherwise she will complain that Kat thinks that she is not cool (and this really upsets Kit who has absolutely no clue what the reference to cool is except that Kat says it in a certain way which doesn't feel right to Kit!)

Oh dear!I surely lose all my patience by dinnertime!!