Unconditional Love

Posted By SLK on Friday, October 22, 2010   { 2 Comment(s) }

No matter how my day has been, whether a migraine has touched it in any way or not or if I've aimed for twenty tasks and achieved only two - there are some things in my life that never change and knowing that gives me comfort...I know that Kit will come running into my arms as soon as she gets off the bus and hand me the message that she 'writes' for me everyday at school. I know that the minute Kat gets on her school bus in the afternoon; she is going to call me from her cell phone (the novelty of the phone continues...) and update me with the latest chit chat from school (Oh yes! And she has a boy Halloween partner this year!! She still cannot believe her teacher could do this to all the girls in class!).

Their love for me is so predictable...always the same...UNCONDITIONAL. Then why do I sometimes lose MY temper and on occasions have confrontations with even a (not yet) 4 yo? I could learn a thing or two from my girls.

What amazes me is that children do not even care about their own pain, their own feelings so much...all they care about is YOU. The other day I had to raise my voice with Kit to get something done as she would just not listen (typical ignore mummy behaviour). She ended up crying saying that she was upset because I was not happy. There have been instances where she thinks “I am sad”, “I am upset” or “my feelings are hurt”.
Kat used to do (still does) exactly the same. Many times, they will not cry for themselves - they will cry for me and those tears hurt me the most - I WILL end up feeling miserable!!

Children ARE truly innocent and for them, it is so important to please their loved ones. Yes, right - the pressure back on me. So we end up making up with a kiss or a sorry or whatever to get rid of the bad feeling!

Whether it’s been a tiring day for them or a truly challenging one, their faces will light up when they see me...even if they are upset, there is a little extra effort required but there is always hope – mother’s love can always help. Where is the magic? Why is not hurting me so important to my kids? I (honestly) never think twice when I am angry and regret later (have to apologise to Kat – Kit is more forgiving – like...in an instant!!)

If our children have so much love for us, are so forgiving and hold us before their own pain and feelings, I feel ashamed sometimes about the way I interact with them. They seem far more mature then I am – more in control of their life! Discipline CAN be achieved by love alone – we just have to believe in it. Kids are amazing and so is our relationship with them...and a mother’s touch? No matter what...ALWAYS comforting and loving!

Tags: best friend, growing up, living with guilt, sorry